Talking to your children about your impending divorce is one of the most difficult conversations a parent can have. As you prepare for this discussion, it is crucial for you to plan what you wish to say to them with your spouse, particularly since presenting a more united front can help your children feel safe and reduce their fears. Given the problems that may have led to the end of your marriage, however, it may be challenging to have this conversation as a parenting team. It is in your children’s best interests that you set these issues aside and focus on their needs, so continue reading to learn some tips that may help you with this process.
Discussing the Divorce with Your Children
Timing is essential when it comes to delivering this news to your children. Choose a time when tensions between you and your spouse are at their lowest and, more importantly, select a time when your children will have plenty of time to process and cope with this life-altering news. If you tell them before dropping them off at school, they will not have enough time to ask questions and may end up acting out at school or their academic performance may suffer.
Here are some additional tips that will help you have this conversation with your children:
- Do not blame each other: Your children will likely ask why you are getting divorced and you might be tempted to point fingers, but this will not do anyone any good. Keep it simple and tell them that the marriage is not working despite your best efforts.
- Assure them that they are loved: It is obvious to you and your spouse that you love your children, but it may not be obvious to them right now. Assure them that they are loved and let them know that your divorce will never change how you feel about them or the fact that you will always be there for them.
- Tell them what you can about the future: Your children may have questions about whether they will remain at the same school or if they will move to a different neighborhood, so if you have the answers to these questions, tell them. If they know what to expect, they will feel a lot less worried about the future.
Your children will likely have more questions about your divorce in the future, so try to be as available as you can be for any follow-up conversations. Whatever you do, however, do not badmouth their other parent.
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If you are getting a divorce and have children, the family law team at Garza Law Firm, LLLP can provide the compassionate legal advice you need. We have the experience and knowledge necessary to help you navigate the complexities of your case.
Reach out to our legal team today at (214) 225-4344 to set up a consultation.